Andy, a rather corpulent boy I know 이런, 비만형 가지고 있다?!

A recent short holiday did me nothing, but did make me become a fatty.
I was not sure how much had I been over-nourished by my mum during the last holiday. But one thing I was sure was I was offered a wide variety of comestible things. Oh goodness, I am fatter now!

“What you actually had? What else could you have?” Somebody might have wanted to know.

The first day when I saw my mum, I saw chocolates, irregular-shaped and oily biscuits brought back from Tianjin. To our astonishment, we could finish the whole duty-free ‘KISS Chocolate’ bought from KLIA, with about 30 + individual packs of them within 12 hours, together with my other sibs. And on the second day, we accomplished our eating ‘mission’ consecutively.
We had almost spent MYR 60 within three days just for the fun of crunching on chocolates.
I couldn’t imagine why I couldn’t control myself to stop biting something at that moment.

I’m getting podgier now and I can feel that when I am walking.
At present, an extra strength is needed to carry my heavier body up and down the hill.
It becomes more obvious when I am sitting, I can feel that my tummy is bigger now and makes me have the breathless feeling. I do not think it is a false alarm but I think it is telling me that my overweight body has created some sort of health problems for me soon. I better watch out for my own health now. I don’t anticipate any bodily problems that could happen to me in these few years, which have very high probability of ruining my going-to-be-realizable dream.

I should always remember my mum’s words:

Health and Safety are everything.
Even if you have earned the whole World;
Without them, you are just having nothing.
As you couldn’t bring them together with you,
As you are lying lifelessly on your bed,
Or you are resting in peace in your casket,
They are not with you.
There is no a life hereafter,
You can only live once,
So keep your health as your first choice, after God.

Hearkening ‘them’ in Wonderment 이앨범 아주 듣기가 좋다!

Just watched Twilight, a romance movie (adapted from Stephenie Meyer’s Twilight Series, a total of four books, Twilight is the first book) pertaining a 17-year old girl and her loved one, Edward, who was a forever-17-years-old vampire, I had a special feeling about it. I should say it was great, better at least than my early judgment about this sort of movie.

It was great until it made me have intention to collect the whole Twilight series by Stephenie Meyer. My gratitude is to the talented writer for she had come out with a story, which had given me an unprecedented experiences on vampires, lamia and werewolves. I used to think vampires as ghastly creatures and the stories about them were always spooky. Somehow, this series related well to its readers about there are also good vampires.

Some people may think it as a girlie movie as it is about romance. I don’t think so as a matter of fact, just because it was not purely about romance, I really like the fighting scene between the two vampires: the protagonist, Edward and a human-blood-loving-vampire, James. It was astounding but fantastic!

I would never forget about the soundtracks to the film. They were so worthy of listening and mention as they suit the plot so well. Even when I am writing this, I am having my hearing sense close to the tracks. The soundtracks are giving me an incredibly pleasant sensation.

The first track, “Super-massive Black Hole” by Muse was an accomplished work. Its mysterious genre, recondite as well, made me have a feeling like taunting one who had lost in a game with me. Though it was wrong but it gave a very favorable feeling. If I’m not mistaken, the track was played when Cullens were having a baseball game.

‘… I learned the other reason they waited for a thunderstorm to play when Jasper, trying to avoid Edward's infallible fielding, hit a ground ball toward Carlisle. Carlisle ran into the ball, and then raced Jasper to first base. When they collided, the sound was like the crash of two massive falling boulders. I jumped up in concern, but they were somehow unscathed…’

The song was somehow giving me a feeling like I was roaring like a thunder rumbling.

I was quite fond of another soundtrack entitled “Full Moon”, which was with a mystical power, sung by The Black Ghosts. The singers’ names had already given me a creepy feeling. I could not reason why I loved this track quite much, perhaps I liked something with implicit meaning.

Blue Foundation’s “Eyes on Fire” was an awe-inspiring work as well. Its genre was quite new to me but I still liked it. “Fight-less Bird, American Mouth” was another soundtrack which gave me a romanticized image of life and the love story. I always have the feeling of being together with my lover and having a slow dance with her when hearkening this song. I feel my eyes were filled with tears when I first listened to this song, I was crying with delights.

This wonderful album has the merit of being able to bring enormous enjoyment to me. All the soundtracks and courses are catchy. And, also the movie, is one of the best movies I ever had that is accomplished with delightfully romantic moments, though it was exceedingly quixotic.

An Unexpected Adjournment to Sunway Pyramid 예기치 않은Sunway여행

‘Access: Limited Connectivity’
‘Connecting to the network is taking longer than usual’
‘The computer is connected to the network but does not…’

All these galling error messages popping out when using one of PCs in the computer lab, which basically has a port connected to a printer, drove me nuts this morning. The slow-responding network connection really exasperated me as I just simply wished to download a doc. file stored in my Yahoo Mailbox, of a size not more than 2 MB from my Yahoo Mailbox, and to print the 23-page document out.

In actual fact, I already knew that this sort of thing would happen before using it for the aforementioned purpose. In order for hindering plagiarisms among her students as one of the university’s stringent rule or policy or whatever it is called, the university discourages her students to print out the entire articles of others directly from the net, by deliberately setting the access of the PCs connected to the printers in the lab to a limited one.

I forgot to bring along Silicon-Power carrying the document that I wished to have a hardcopy of. This was the plan at the beginning. And, this was the real issue. Should I get my own blames?

‘Download is progressing steadily’
‘45 % downloaded’
‘0 kb/sec’

It was really progressing steadily. I could see that. 0kb/sec and the network icon in the taskbar did not seem to be animated.

The connection was dead.

‘Logging off’ was the last appearing on the monitor. I left.

At about 7.30 p.m. after my dinner, which had been a very despondent one, my uncle called.

“…, hey, are you okay to have your lunch in my house tomorrow noon?”

I murmured something, which I did not think a normal man would understand. I thought I was saying it musingly.

“Huh? Louder please, I am driving…”
“Sorry, uncle, what is that?”
“Can or not, have lunch in my house tomorrow noon, I had returned back to KL with your mum’s cooking and something for you too… from your mum”

I remained silent briefly for five seconds and I said.

“I suppose I can go to your place tomorrow with ease coz the bus service is available. As for the return one, I am afraid it could be a little bit troublesome since the bus service for Saturday is only available till one noon.” I finished my last sentence with a trembling voice.

“Oh, that’s not an issue. I am free tomorrow. So see ya tomorrow. Hey... What time you will reach?”
“I will set out at ‘bout 11 a.m.”

He interrupted. “I said lunch, not that earlier”.
“Oh yea, I spent about two hours to reach your house…”
A second interruption, a very loud one, from another side of the phone: “Yea, I remember, see you then”.

At twelve prompt at noon,
“Open the gates! I don’t want myself to be sunned for so long!” I ordered impatiently my cousins to open the automatic gates for me.

It was a hazily noon. I heard something from my cousins: “He is here, mum!”
And the gate opened, I walked in, preparing myself for necessary greetings.

“Are you in a hurry going back?”
“Your mum brought something for you.”
“Are you hungry? You might need to wait for a while for lunch to be ready.”

“It is okay” and “I am not, take your time”
“If that is it, then I will bring you back to your apartment, probably a little bit late as I will have to fetch mother in law later, who is in Cheras now then.”

“Okey-doke, I am okay with that” Usually, I didn’t speak more, especially in certain circumstances, which I think I would trouble others.

He yawned and asked for a short nap. Before that, he made sure the three cousins of mine did what they should. He reprimanded them for several times for lots of things remained messy. My aunt was busy with her dishes, but occasionally, she added in some rebuking words.
Naturally, I was having an awkward feeling at this sort of moment. I just kept quiet.

I waited on the settee, reading freshly-brought book by James Herbert.
My uncle had done his sleeping and I heard he mumbled something to himself in the kitchen, something about going to Sunway Pyramid.
I was of course not the only one getting what he had murmured, but also my aunt and the three playful cousins.

Vaguely, I heard my aunt said ‘Your eldest boy needs to have some books from Popular, school is going to start…,” “I don’t think Sunway’s got Popular, I need to go somewhere with Popular…” An endless argument soon started between my uncle and my aunt about the existence of the bookstore in the megamall. It did not last long, unexpectedly, for only 5 minutes. It usually happened for a whole evening or a whole day. I know it.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ** * * * * * * * * * *
“Who wants to follow me? I am going to buy tickets for tomorrow’s, anyone?” my uncle always loves to ask such question when he’s going elsewhere.
“I will follow the aunt and him for books.” I said, coldly.

I knew he didn’t listen. He was busy asking one of my cousins when I answered. He always does this and my aunt has always reminded him to stop for listening. I had got used to this since I was ten years old, sometimes what he does are really amusing. ^..^

“We shall not remember to have the yummiest thing in this world, the snow (a cup of flavored snowy hors d'oeuvre) after the book-shopping, okay?” He repeated again and again about how good the snowy thing is and how is the feeling that we would soon have when the snowy things melt on our tongue. He was always greedy for food. My aunt described him this way.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * ** * * * * * * * * * *







I need to stop now. =..=” (It's a bit exceedingly long)
I feel like going to write out a story about the whole trip if I continue.
After all, this trip was really an unexpected one. At first, I just wished to get my things from them. And, at last what I got: the special dinner-experience I had never had before: superb肉骨茶 in Subang. I was having it with great relish and gratitude as well. Thank God for the good family members I am having and the good times I am always having with them.

Freedom or Repression? 자유, 또는 억압?

A quote from the Bible Scripture: Genesis 3: 1 – 6, carrying an implication being that Jehovah, our God always gives us freedom for any deeds we would like to have in our everyday life.

… Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden. And the woman said unto the serpent, We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden. But of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shall not eat of it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die. And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die: For God doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil. And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit, thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat…

Just like what have been depicted in the scripture, the Mighty one created the forbidden fruits, letting the first man and woman to choose whether or not they want to have. The first human beings had chosen to take the forbidden fruits and therefore, they anyhow needed to bear much of the responsibility for the path they had picked. Adam and Eve were led by their actions into slavery, being trussed up by sins.

I am always envisioning what our relationship with God will be if they did not opt for the wrong way. ‘Will all the human beings still live in Eden, the place of happiness?’

Human beings are born with original sin and are always under Satan’s enticement into committing sins. Some are vulnerable to it while some are immune to it. Again, a choice is awaiting our decision.

Dear Father, I understand the real meaning of freedom given and I hope my choice won’t be the one leading me to servitude. Please forgive me my debts as I forgive my debtors. And please, God, lead me not into temptation, but deliver me from evil. For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, forever. Amen.

Her renascence 여자의 되살아나다

This morning, she was found lifeless lying on her ‘bed’, appearing being compelled to drown herself in loneliness. She had been lonesome all this while, though just half a year. She couldn’t do anything but just beseech God to reimburse any loss she had. She mused on how different his life would have been, had she not been left alone. She prayed. Ineluctably, she knew she would have to defer to God’s will.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Chomping on a TESCO™’s double-chocolate-chips cookie with great relish, another hand holding a glass of shop-bought syrup, the scribbler, had made his mind to visit her again on the spur of the moment. He got ready with all the things he fancied could be her needs and set out.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

With the magic wand waved in his hands skillfully, she aroused from faint. She gave him an affectionate hug and kept muttering incessantly to herself that God had answered her prayers. She stopped when he soothed her by tapping gently her back. She held covetous stares on him, as though she’s saying ‘Don’t leave me’. Unforeseen by her, he agreed.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

For self-enrichment’s sake, I need to continue the journey left once before decisively, viz. I should continue my scribbling journey, which could be a very rugged one. Besides, being more ‘book-grubbing’, reading more from others, sharing and saying fewer words. And, never forget; stop being a spendthrift, NEVER.

P/S: Due to a minor inconvenience in regards to the availability of Internet service, I think I’ll opt for offline blogging and updated the real one from time to time. Christmas is rounding its corner, Merry Christmas!

The Second Day Here in UCSI

One of the buildings found in the main campus of my University

The University, The Experience

The above is the motto of the university college where I am currently having my A-level study here (In fact, it is an university now, and the classes for A-level will start officially on Wednesday). Shamelessly claimed that this motto is very true despite having only a short period of exposure to the new environment here but frankly speaking, I have experienced kinda more things though just the second day when I am having this post.

Nevertheless, within these two days, I have truly learnt how to go through my life without my parents around. Meanwhile, I have met some new friends, some of them are ReCommers but some of them are just visitors of the mentioned forum. Anyway, I am still looking forward to meeting other ReCommers like sugarclaze, nana90 and so forth. The ReCommers who have not known me but prefer to know and interact with me, please don't be hesitant to notify me. I am very friendly and of course, very kind-hearted.

Not only keeping on my aim, i.e. to get pretty excellent results for my A-level, I will also keep posting in my blog as long as I am living with Internet support or network connection, I hope my visitors can continue to carry out their roles as my guests of the blog in spite of my location and situation now.

P/s: Identified ReCommers: Herm, Ann, Pheonix, Aeries, Mei - all gals, gals rule the world. :( I have met Vaan today, he is pretty friendly and pretty sad to say: Vaan haven't finished his story about the journey of each ReCommer leading to this university. :P

City of temptation, Here I come!

The largest city of the Malay speaking nation, Kuala Lumpur in which I will have my living here for two years for my pre-university courses in University College Sedayah International. In spite of not being the most floushing city in Asia, Kuala Lumpur is a city full of temptation, the gloss and glitter of the city would seem pretty fascinating to us, especially the outsiders which are from sururban or rural areas of the country. I hope I can focus on my study anyhow in the college besides learning how to live a urban life.

Obliging + Valiant

Yesterday, when I was on the way to a nearby seven-eleven store to have my DiGi number's credit reloaded, I had met with an old lady by accident, who was almost my grandma's age was sitting on a pavement, exactly in front of a drugstore. The aged woman hopelessly watched the heavy pedestrian traffic on the pavement, rubbing both her hands with her knees. At that moment, I could surmise that the woman must be having a slip and fall before she sat on the sidewalk, since as far I know, nobody have ever taken or would like a rest on the dirty pavement.

Meanwhile, I moved to a very slow walking pace and I stopped when there were perhaps ten paces between me and the old lady. I beheld the lady in a furtive or circumspect manner as I was having a hesitation about what to do next: Keep on moving to 7-11 store or doing the opposite way.

Well on that time, I had many facts to chew upon before I could make up my mind whether or not to help the old lady - I chose to have my phone credit topped up at the end without acting out my compassion for the lady. One of the factors leading me to have such utterly ruthless decision was due to my doubt or uncertainty about the woman's actual need.

When at home, I started to feel a pang of remorse for being over-rational when coming to lending my hands to somebody in need of help. And in the end, the decision that I thought to be the most rational one was actually the most irrational one. :(

Never try to rationalize the role of a Good Samaritan. Sometimes, we would have found helping the needy to be an irrational act, well, at least we would feel gratified to see how much our work (our help) is appreciated when others say 'Thank you'. An obliging person is not necessarily a valiant person, this is what I am trying to say.

Translation or Transition?

Globalization is having a quickening pace and is predicted that it will continue to have a growing impact on business organization and practice. (One of Thomas Lauren Friedman's stances or opinions about globalization). It is thus a process by which the people of the world are unified into a single society and function together, which is with some sort of great difficulty, for example a difference between the cultures and languages amongst the citizens of various countries, which are trying to be in contact with one another.

Due to recent advances in information communication technology (ICT), there are quite a number of big corporations earning revenue from advertising related to Internet Search, Web-based emails and social networking: for instances, Yahoo and Google have conducted researches by requesting their engineers to be engaged in the innovation process by spending about 20 % of their time working on a chosen project and thus producing many not-for-profit tools such as Google Talk or Yahoo Messenger and Gmail or Yahoo Mail.

The corporations also develop their own translation tools through Google Language Tools and Yahoo Babel Fish to alleviate the problem related to difficulty when talking to a foreigner who does not know one's language, so a person would be easy to understand a single word, a phrase or a sentence, and even an article without even knowing a language which the piece of writing is in. However, the so-called translators really suck. In lieu of translation, they carry out transition, making a mess of the actual or real meaning of a particular piece of writing. The translators sometimes make the meaning or of a simple word or sentence, or even a message to be misconstrued by the readers, consequently resulting in a succession of problems.

Well, we should proclaim something with proofs, i.e. the translation results as follows: P/s: The translation results are sometimes hilariously funny.

Google translation (from English to Simplified Chinese)
E.g. To begin with, I used a common insulting remark:

"Shut up! You Moron!" Pretty scary result: 闭嘴！你木伦！

After that, I had performed a reverse by translating the two given Chinese characters: 木伦 to see the term's meaning in English, and to my amazement, a translation result appeared, which made me faint: Wood-Lun

How about using something scientific?

"Data that is presented in a table can be understood easily."
Not-quite meaningful result: 数据是在一个表是可以理解的容易。

Again, I translated the result given into English and surprisingly, I realized that the translator had changed the actual meaning of the original sentence: Data in a form that can easily understandable What differentiates between table and form?

I decided to have other alternatives in translation of the similar sentences from English into Simplified Chinese and the following shows the results I had:

Yahoo Babel Fish Translation:

闭嘴! 您蠢人! Not bad :)

在桌里被提出的数据可以容易地被了解 Well, scientific data you've collected from an experiment, according to Yahoo Babel Fish, is related to your drawers. :D

Huajian Translation:

闭嘴！ 你白痴! Prefect!

在表格里被提出的数据可以容易被理解 Not bad though can't still distinguish between form and table

Kodensha Translation:

沉默！ 你愚笨! = = "

在桌子中被表示的数据容易能理解 A round or rectangular one provides you with accurate and precise data?

Systran Translation:

闭嘴! 您蠢人! = Yahoo Babel Fish

在桌里被提出的数据可以容易地被了解 = Yahoo Babel Fish

Click2Translate Translation:

闭嘴！你低能者! Fantastic

数据那在一张表中被赠送能够容易地被理解 = Complimentary?

Look at the power of the translators, do you dare to use them for translation when talking to a new friend who does not know your m0ther language? :)Well, to read more about such funny translation story, please move on to another post by one of my bloggy friends: Surely You are Joking, Google Translation.

Be Bold, Man!

How you define the word 'bold'? Bold does not mean radical, but it is an appropriate adjective to be used when coming to wikis. The following shows a quote from an article of Wikiversity:

Wikis only work if people are bold. Go ahead and change something here by editing something there, correcting a mistake or by adding a new perspective or improving the language, whatever you like, as long as it is not a bad edit like vandalism. Wiki is what you are expected to do. Even if it is not the best it can be it is still good to put something down because chances are other people will come along and help improve it. Over time, things improve. Surprisingly, it is something that actually works as long as civility is maintained.

You'll quickly notice the natural and understandable impulse of authors to "own" and protect their writing; this is counterproductive when it comes to wikis. It is a good idea to get rid of that tendency by being open to other people's edits. That's the only way a page will improve over time. Think about it: you might not know every perspective and every angle of a subject. Regardless of how thoughtfully you work, an additional set of eyes will always find something to improve. So be bold not just when editing other pages but accept it on your "own" as well.

Every visitor to my blog is free to treat this blog as a wiki, whereby my guests can give your comments about each post of my blog, probably doing something as mentioned above as an indirect way of editing my blog. Let's us form a community devoted to collaborative learning and treat my blog as your "own" as well! :)

How to Embed Youtube Videos in Your Blog?

A video is a good one only when it is shared. For bloggers who wish to share their original videos or Youtube videos, you can follow the procedure below.

The process is simple indeed, even a dummie can do it. For who wish to share their original videos, do sign up for a Youtube account and upload your video and get the embed code. Otherwise, you can easily insert any public youtube video into your blog. Before this, go to Youtube and search for the video. For instance, if you want to embed a video pertaining to funny kitty, just simply search it and copy the embed code onto your clipboard. After this, sign intoyour blogger account and click the New Post button and select the tab-option 'Edit html' before have the html code pasted.

Finally, publish your video by clicking the 'Publish Post' which is located below the editing board. And that's it, as you can see now, the video you wish to share is embeded in your post properly. If you like, you can change the width and height of the video by replacing the values to your desirable one. You can also make your video go center by adding <div align="center"> and </div> before and after the code, as follows:

<div align="center"><object width="425" height="344" align="center"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/nTasT5h0LEg&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></div>

And that's it, you have made it. :) Hope it helps.
P/S: Thanks, Changyang for helping me with the XHTML Elements.

Kittens are Hilarious!

A youtube video by kjpar7: 'Funny Kittens'

Kittens are Hilariously Funny.
The video made me laugh my head off! Enjoy :)

Booty

Shamelessly request every passerby to have a look on my booty. :) 

There's a bulge in each single envelope, what do you think 'the bulge' is? Tada! The 'bulges' total MYR 290 $ )

Do you wish to have one of the 'bulges'? ;P
Footnote: The 'bulges' are the booty looted from my ex-school. :)

A Tiring Day

It's about 11.50 p.m. when I was scribbling something in this post and knowing that there would be approximately 10 minutes or less left to end my today's life and will start another new day ten minutes later. At this moment, I was trying to refresh my memory of how had I spent my life today, did I fritter away my time on useless stuffs? I could shamelessly say I had been spending nine hours (not exactly :D) editing my newly created blog on the same day besides setting up some useful add-ons for this freshly created blog like Flickr. I had never tried anything like this before, so I found it really hard for me to create every post smoothly, nevertheless, I had gained some experiences and I believed now I could manage to use the thingummies much better. I was kinda agreeing with my parents that I am pretty quick on the uptake, especially coming to technological stuffs. :)

Am I squandering my time away on blogging? If this question is directed to my mum or other elders. Yea, they would have almost the same opinion for this and I think everyone is certain about the answer. I kinda agree with them in terms of my health if constantly getting on with my PC works like blogging, playing games and other typing stuffs. Then again, blogging is not bad if by which we can pick up something concerning knowledge, which is probably unable to be find in books that we have everyday. In the meantime, we are able to relax ourselves by doing something we love or expressing ourselves in a different way via texts, videos, musics and photos. 8)

Considerably poor or having a limited English vocabulary anyhow is one of my weaknesses realized during the blogging process besides having too little knowledge about what's happening around. I begin to feel self-conscious about myself whilst reading others' blogs and their experience-sharing pieces. I could only say: "Why didn't I just work harder on this language before this?" and nothing will change if I don't have anything done or changed to myself since there is an English saying that Actions Speak Louder than Words. :)

Do I Deserve?

A fair morning, not until the cuckoo said eleven o'clock, when my brother brought me an envelope measuring 23 cm × 10 cm with my name and home address typewritten in totally five rows and a blue circular stamp of my school's name on it. Didn't really take care of my brother's words on that time due to my annoyance at the way he talked to his elders, and I had the letter from his hands and kept on reading a paragraph in book by Rais Yatim. A minute later after finishing the paragraph, I took up the envelope and read its contents, as follows:

Encik / Cik,

Jemputan ke Majlis Anugerah Cemerlang Sekolah Menengah Dato' Idris 2008

Dengan hormatinya merujuk keada tujuan di atas.

2. Sehubungan dengan hal itu, pihak sekolah dengan sukacitanya menjemput encik / cik serta ibu bapa / penjaga hadir ke Majlis Anugerah Cemerlang Sekolah Menengah Dato' Idris 2008 yang telah diadakan mengikut butiran berikut:

Tarikh: 21hb Jun 2008 (Sabtu)

Masa: 8.30 Pagi

Tempat: Dewan Sekolah SMK Dato' IDRIS

Pakaian: Rasmi

Before scanning to the end of the letter for more useful information, I took a breath and let my mind wondering whether or not to attend the ceremony since I am leading a hectic life in recently to prepare myself physically and mentally before I commence my A-level on the first of July. Apart from my business, I was thinking about the exhausting tasks required by JPA (Jabatan Perkhidmatan Awam or Public Service Department) to be done and handed in on the day of registration, namely the 30th of this June before I can get enrolled for the course in UCSI (University College Sedayah International) in Cheras and also my papa and mama's so-called business. My mum gotta to bring her *lovely* (That's what she thinks) students to Ayer Tawar for a Science Carnival held by PPD Manjung (Office of Education of Manjung district, not for sure) in SMK Ambrose on the same day. Without letting my mind to keep on wandering, I had made my mind up not to attend the ceremony but still continue with the letter:

3. Kerjasama pihak encik / cik amat dihargai dan didahului dengan ucapan terima kasih. Sebarang pertanyaan sila didahului dengan ucapan terima kasih. Sebarang pertanyaan sila hubungi Puan Ahainie ...

I made a fleeting glimpse to the end of the letter until the signature of the present principal of my ex-school. Apart from the signature of the new principal that I was not acquainted with, nothing else at the bottom of the letter had caught my attention to review the letter again. Wandering for the next five minutes and starting to mull over some seemingly unrelated questions: Am I worthy of the best academic award (since I was the best in my ex-school last year) which would be given to me tomorrow morning? Was the excellence due to my diligence before and during the examination or mainly by sheer luck? :(

Such thoughts had struck me unceasingly since the first day of joining ReCom (The Reborn Community, a worldwide portal for Malaysian students to hold discussion about their problems and share their thoughts) . Joining the community might be advantageous to me but somewhat detrimental to my confidence. Meeting different people in there, and have begun to feel myself being a nobody in this competitive world.

On a personal level, I am a deep person but considerably poor in self-expression. I love self-improvement and have numerous moments of self-doubt a day. Sadly, this has thrust myself into a position of awesome responsibilities and it is really exhausting and burdensome. I'm attempting to adapt myself quickly to this situation - and I hope all the efforts I had and shall have can surpass my expectation in the future.